Hello blog, long time.
I haven't updated my blog for such a long time. Cz i've been very busy since I gave birth to zayn. My life is quite okay unlike before. My relationship with mom changed.x Thanks to our Lord God, he really is the best person to speak with when you're down and lonely. I am so amazed abt how he changed our lives this year. I just hope he won't give up on me. I know he has plans for me. I did something stupid this couple of weeks. I know that it isn't right but I'm happy about what's happening. Just goin with the flow.x I still feel that something is missing. I wanted to know what it is. Why do I always feel incomplete? I am not crazy tho. haha. Not even depressed. How I miss my lola. I wish she's here with me.I know she'll guide me along the way. I hope and looking forward to be a better mom for zoey and zayn. There are times I feel like I'm no good with this motherhood thingy. Maybe post partum is just attacking me lately. I miss my old self. A part of me is missing. why????????
I hope there's someone out there whom I can speak with and will make me happy if I'm sad. There's this one person who i'd like to talk to but we can't talk that much. I like speaking with him. Yes, he's a HE. A special person who i'd treasure for the rest of my life. Not gonna mention his name though but he's a very good friend. I guess God gave me "him" specially those times na I wanna give up na. he's the one who lifted me up. It was so funny cz he said that he felt like I'm obssessed with him so he blocked me before. Haha! well one thing he didn't know is that I like speaking with him all the time cause he really is making me happy. that's all though. Well I can say that this is the first time I got to chat with a guy all the timeeeeee. I am such a snob person. but with him, lol not at all. Like super kulitttt ko talaga. and bwisit much na sya. HAHAHA! funny but crazy.
well kasi he has a girlfriend so ayun. haha! Well, we had our talk the other day and yeah I just realized that I am bein an asshole. I don't wanna ruin his life. So guess im gonna li-lo.
That's what I am doin now. I have to. :p I need to. ;)
Lol i have to go it's almost 3am. Kinda scared. x_x
